The pain of a young boy who begins the journey of life from a broken home.
I was born in a broken home, being the first child of my parents I had so much responsibilities on my shoulder that weighed me down.
I had to live an examplary life for my younger brothers behind and make my mom happy with me all the time.
But the situation between my parents weren’t helping matters at all
I became depressed as time goes on.
At a very tender age because I saw everything that was happening with my eyes but couldn’t do anything even when I understood it clearly
I cried in secret for being useless then this affected my mental health….I became a real psychopath, everyone that came across me never wanted to relate with me because of my temperament.
Then one day I and my brothers were picked up from school by mom. Instead of going to our house we went to a different place entirely
I asked my mom where she was taking us to she said ” our new home”I was so little to understand what was going on then
We all lived in our new home except my Dad.
Well my dad is someone who never respect the values of marriage. Instead of my dad looking for us, he was busy playing around spending time with different women that built thick grudge in his heart against his wife, which later grew into hatred.
For years I have been living without my father, just my mom and my brothers were my the only family I have.
I grew up with hatred for my dad and later took up drinking because it helps suppress all the negative feelings I have towards him.
I never wanted to be like my father.
I feel jealous seeing others with their parents playing and laughing which later draw me into the state of depression and struggling with suicidal tendency.
But I never let my mental state affect my education. I make sure I read hard and passed my waec and other exams with flying colours and pursued my dream of becoming Lawyer in the university of Ibadan.
As soon as I resumed school, I met a guy who was my best friend and my boyfriend
He is gay (I’m praying for him) he stood by me and gave me support and shoulders to cry on, he tried all he could to make me stop drinking but all his effort is futile.
And I soon fell for him, that was the beginning of my sexual perverseness.
I commit alot of sexual atrocities with him and
I would sometimes masturbate whenever he wasn’t around to satisfy my sexual urges,
Which also was the cause of my anxiety disorders.
This went on for a while until I saw a post on a friend’s status, I knew I needed serious help.
I sent a very long message to the angel God sent to me
From then, She began to teach me about Christianity and what it takes to be a true Christian.
She said first I should let go of my past and leave everything to God but before that I should surrender my life to Jesus, Which I did and she prayed with me. I gradually got out of my woods before it too late.
Though I’m not perfect but I can say He’s so faithful to me to help me out of my woods because I couldn’t do it all alone.
My advise to anyone passing through what I passed through is this: Don’t give up on life because the One who loves you the most will never give up on you like he did to me.